12/21 Looking Forward and Looking Back 12/21

I was up all night last night but it wasn’t to sip on the last few drops of  the world’s last night. I figure it’s dramatic enough that by the time my head hits the pillow most nights, it’s only after I’ve forced it to with an Ativan, because somewhere in the back of my chemo brain I guess I put a helluva lot of pressure on myself to make sure I’m not wasting this incredible gift of time I’ve been given.

Some nights I let the insomnia ride. Last night I was awake to catch this spoiler alert from New Zealand on Facebook; a few hours later I was still awake to catch the first snowflakes falling on Cincinnati bringing tidings of winter. Not the end of the world.

sun's up

I didn’t SHARE it. Didn’t want to ruin the suspense for anybody. Didn’t feel like dissing on the Mayans. So what if they sucked at making calendars? I suck at keeping mine straight and showing up to things on the right day, let alone, on time. In fact, forget about me ever being on time. It’s most likely not gonna happen. Except by accident. And hopefully not a literal accident, but you can never be too sure with me. Anyway, one of the “side effects” I got from all of my being occasionally radioactive with a chance of superpowers was the ability to teleport to wherever my calendar says I’m supposed to be. But unfortunately I forgot the launch code during the “Vespa Incident” so now that superpower is about as useless as a Mayan calendar.

Speaking of calendars and dates 12/21 will not just live in Mayan infamy, but will always and forever be a milestone for me.

3 years ago today I was downing my last of 24 chemo cocktails. Here’s a video of the nurse cutting me off. Bartender, I’d had enough.

And my Redheads wrote this song for my last chemo cocktail and sang it to me when I’d downed that last one. It’s my chemo cocktail theme song but it’s also my favorite Christmas song ever. Everybody knows it as the “Cancer is a Bitch” song.

That version will always have a special place in my heart because they wrote it in the stairwell that day while I was downing that last  chemo cocktail. Click HERE to check out the studio version they released on iTunes. It costs 99 cents, which doesn’t exactly feed starving Redheads, but they do have this piggy bank who likes to eat.

2 years ago I was writing a couple chapters in my book on location, in a place ironically germane to this calendar debacle situation: The Riviera Maya. Dave and I were on holiday, having been given an incredibly generous gift of a trip far, far away from cancer and chemo, from the Karen Wellington Foundation. The resort we stayed at was called Adventure Spa, and like the name implies, it was the perfect balance of adventure and pampering. To me it was like a diving board… into my life. Take II.


By this time last year I’d published SHAKEN NOT STIRRED… A CHEMO COCKTAIL and had begun diving into what next? otherwise known as the Mayan year of 2012 in which the world was supposed to end today. But didn’t. (refer to illustration at the top of the page;)

My book!

Which brings us up-to-date and explains my insomnia all in one fell swoop. Anyway, so I’m still trying to work out the what next? of everything. Last year was a pretty packed and crazy fun prequel filled with my Amanda graduating, getting married, and moving with her husband Gary to Wales for a mission trip. Not to mention, me trying to pay forward this incredible gift of time I have by spending it and myself loving my neighbor and kicking cancer’s ass.

One small way I thought it would be fun to celebrate and pay it forward a bit was to offer the Kindle version of my book FREE today, now that everybody has time to read since the world didn’t end. Yay! The cool thing about the Kindle version is the pictures are in color! Even the pic of me after the “Vespa Incident”! Anyway, click HERE for the link.

kindle book

One comment

  1. Terri Hale says:

    Loved looking there and back again with you thru this post. Can’t wait to hear what this next year is going to look like for you. This last year you seemed to be all over the planet, all the time, I’d say teleporting is alive and well in your life. Love you and Merry Christmas to all the Evanses at the Shire from all the Hales in the Dale.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *