[Reposting this from The SCAR Project Blog, which I manage for The SCAR Project.]

THE SCAR PROJECT ANNOUNCES TORONTO PREMIERE OF THE INTERNATIONAL EXHIBITION—MARCH 28-APRIL 6, 2014

March 3, 2014—The SCAR Project, the groundbreaking photographic exhibition created by fashion photographer David Jay is set to premiere March 28 at Edward Day Gallery, 952 Queen St West, Toronto Ontario.

The SCAR Project is a series of large-scale portraits of young breast cancer survivors. On the surface an awareness raising campaign for young women, The SCAR Project’s deeper message is one of humanity. Ultimately, The SCAR Project is not about breast cancer, but the human condition itself; the images transcend the disease, illuminating the scars that unite us all.

Sponsored by Rethink Breast Cancer, the world-renowned exhibition will open this year’s Breast Fest on March 28, 2014. This marks the first time the exhibition will be shown to Canadian audiences. The gallery will be open for public viewing March 28-April 6 (closed Sunday and Monday). Gallery hours are Tuesday-Saturday, 10:00 am – 6:00 pm, Sunday by appointment. Admission is free.

A screening of the EMMY Award winning documentary about The SCAR Project: Baring It All will be shown at the Bloor Hotdocs Cinema at 3:30pm on Sunday, March 30. Tickets are $10. A Q&A session with David Jay will follow the screening.www.breastfest.ca.

For more information please contact :

Jennifer Rashwan, Touchwood PR  416.593.0777 x 205,jennifer@touchwoodpr.com

Alma Parvizian, Touchwood PR     416.593.0777 x 202,alma@touchwoodpr.com

For more information on The SCAR Project visit the website:www.thescarproject.org and www.thescarprojectblog.com. Follow @thescarproject on Twitter and Facebook.

For more information on Rethink Breast Cancer visitwww.rethinkbreastcancer.com

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[This post is dedicated to my friend Denise who played the part of my delightful sidekick on my recent Quixotic adventure along the Pacific Coastal Highway.  I’ve got to hand it to her for just agreeing to go with me. We’d only met Facebook to Facebook through her daughter Jolene—the youngest SCAR Project model. Jolene was diagnosed with breast cancer at only 17 freaking years old, which pisses me off every single time I think about it. This past October Jolene put down the damn pink boxing gloves to get a little rest in peace—2 weeks before she turned 26. Cancer is a such a freaking jerk like that. But in spite of it, or maybe to spite it, the community that exists and the friendships that sprout up from that big damn C… form a club that you didn’t want to join but now find yourself counting your blessings for. (#178, btw.) And that is why, when iPhoned Denise and told her I had a crazy ass idea of an adventure to run by her, she didn’t even hesitate but said, “Hell yeah!” And that is the once upon a time that began our epic road trip from San Fran to LA for The SCAR Project LA cocktail party kick-off, and then back again, with flowers in our hair, of course. Or maybe it was a pencil #179. You know me.]

‘Twas a little Thelma and Louise takes the Bucket List on a road-trip, minus, of course, the driving off a cliff part. But the point was, we had so much fun it’s not even really fair.

So as I was saying in Part I, I don’t really do bucket lists. (Though I did dig the movie.)

I tried. I really tried. Had the pencil drawn from behind the old ear flap, twirling in the fingers, ready to fly across the paper with reckless abandon. Then, as you know, I freaked out.

The point, methinks, my pencil was trying to make, was, why on earth would anybody want to wait until they are dying to start really living?

And because it’s a #2 pencil, it gets extra credit for bringing up this parallel point: Instead of counting down only to cross things off, why not count UP and keep counting as if there were no periods but only ellipses.

Keep counting like there’s no tomorrow. Now that’s a list I can’t scribble fast enough.

In fact, I’ve been scribbling such a list ever since I read THIS book #181 (Scroll down a little and there’s a trailer on the right. Scroll down a little bit more and there’s a link to read the first chapter.)

But besides big things like an epic road trip along California Highway 1 #182, there’s lots of small things that would never make a bucket list and to me they are just as important as the epic things. Like I always say, any reason to pop a cork on a bottle of champagne #183 is a good one, no matter how small.

And since today is the 4th of July, the more corks popping #184 the better. Sounds like fireworks #185 in broad daylight. No sense in waiting till it gets dark out to start the party. Cleanses the palette and tickles the fancy for seizing and celebrating all the special moments, big and small. Because I don’t know about you, but I’m assuming—because it doesn’t really bother me if I make an ass out of myself as long as you’re OK with the probability that if you’re anywhere near me you will also most likely be implicated—that we all want the whole enchilada out of this life. Are with me? Because I don’t mind sharing.

So to sum up… also, to pair with that enchilada, not to mention, all that champagne and slap happy bubbles, might I suggest a side of snapshots of such moments which kept taking my breath away there and back again, along California Highway 1? “Twas such a bon freaking voyage! So lights, camera, action, bon appetite, and of course cheers. By all means, cheers, and love, of course. And also happy 4th!

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I. Love. Making lists and crossing things off. Especially, crossing things off. Then, wadding up said crossed off list and really showing it who’s boss. Slam freaking dunk.

Now, you might be thinking, “You’re pretty freaking tech-geeky-savvy, Joules… why not use your iPhone (#177)?…”

Been there, done that, bought the app for that. And, while I do admit, it is slightly satisfying watching the item *poof* disappear when you check the box, 1) I’m not really a check in the boxes kinda girl, and, 2) slam dunking an iPhone is just asking for trouble with Siri.

But really, all I was trying to do, is explain that all those post-it notes behind me in the photo are not a mess. They are my preciousssss…lists. Organized chaos, if you will.

Those particular ones were all the rabbit trails of my brain in regards to a couple weeks ago, in which my Amanda Michele Freaking Evans got MARRIED, graduated college, moved back to the Evanshire—where she and her now HUBBY will be living for the summer while they work and raise funds for a 10-month mission trip with YWAM Wales this September. (To follow their adventures there and back again, click HERE.) Also, my Mikeyy moved out of the Evanshire and in with his big brother, my Mateo, on campus at UC. Then, we moved the groom’s things into the Evanshire.

If you’ve ever done a Rubik’s cube with your feet while blindfolded you understand the logistics involved, that bigass bottomless cup of coffee, and all. those. precious. lists.

There is one list that freaks me out though. It’s the one list to rule them all: The Bucket List.

When I got cancer, of course I sat down and wrote Bucket List at the top of a page. After all, isn’t “Thou shalt make a bucket list” at the top of the What To Expect When You’re Kicking Cancer’s Ass Big Ten list? I’m pretty sure it’s either #1 or #2, but I forget which. And of course, I totally “blame the chemo” for that—which, I’m positive, is #9 or #10. But I digress, which isn’t really on the list, but sometimes I like to write things in just so I can cross them off.

That’s how much fun I think crossing things off is.

Except for, come to find out, on bucket lists.

Don’t. Want. To. Slam. Dunk. That. One. Don’tevenwanttostartthatlistthat’showmuchidon’twanttoEVERfinishit. To me it’s more like “the list that must not be named”. So yeah, I might have panicked and maybe sweat a few bullets, staring like a deer in the headlights of that freaking blinking cursor of a number 1. It went down a little something like this:

Me: (retrieving the yellow #2 pencil from behind my ear, twirling it in the right to open up the noggin to pencil channel, left elbow on the table, left hand cradling the chinny chin chin, left index finger in the shhh position so I can hear the light bulbs popping up, which I would then upcycle into thought bubbles-cuz I’m green like that-in which my version of 1001 things to do meets Arabian Nights meets Lambchop-from which I would transcribe   my list that doesn’t end…

1. (staring you down all Clint Eastwood style): “Go ahead, make my day. Fill in the blank, punk. Do ya feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”

Me: Not particularly, actually. I have cancer. Duh. (Yeah, I’d say duh to Clint Eastwood if he asked me a stupid question like that at a moment like that.)

At which point, cue the melodrama and fade into the theme from Love Story… “Where do I begin?” I think you see my dilemma?

Where? To begin? At which point my pencil showed its true color shining through and experienced stage fright as if said blinking cursor was not only channeling Dirty Harry, but on Speed  : “STAY ON OR GET OFF, PUNK”

Way. Too. Much. Pressure. At which point I put the pencil back in my ear and crumple up the list which must not be named. I mean, stress causes cancer and stuff, so slam dunk that, if ya know what I mean.

Or maybe kick it instead. Yeah, kick the freaking you-know-what-list. For three points and the win!

And with that, please tune in next time when the ucket-bay list takes a ride along the Pacific Coastal Highway with Thelma and Louise.

Tune in this Saturday at 9 pm to the Style Network’s world premiere of “Baring It All”—Patricia Zagarella’s groundbreaking documentary about the Pulitzer nominated SCAR Project.

“Baring It All” follows fashion photographer David Jay, into the worlds of four young breast cancer survivors, exploring their journeys and being photographed for the SCAR Project. “Baring It All” portrays what: “Surviving Cancer. Absolute Reality.” Is really all about, for them (and for the more than 10,000 young women like them, who are diagnosed each year).

“Baring It All” uncovers what’s beneath the pink ribbons.

In the rolling out of the red carpet for Saturday night’s premiere, I interviewed “Baring It All” filmmaker Patricia Zagarella. So without further ado, how about some lights, camera…and action (cue up the first question, enter Patricia Zagarella for the answer parts):

Q: How did you find out about The SCAR Project?

A: David Jay and I have a mutual friend, who was visiting NY from Australia. She randomly bumped into David while on her visit and he told her about the Scar Project. She then sent me a link and my co-producer, Nicola and I, were blown away by the photographs – the beauty and the pain, every image and every woman’s eyes screamed a different story we wanted to learn more.

Q: What inspired you to start filming the documentary?

A: When I first saw the SCAR Project I was captivated by the raw reality conveyed by his photos. Striking and beautiful, yet confronting and almost brutal, they pushed me to a place I normally contentedly avoided. I was both shocked and saddened, but drawn to the images like a magnet. Despite that the photos spoke volumes, I had a barrage of questions screaming in my head, not only about the young women in the photographs but also about the photographer: Who was he? Why was a successful fashion and beauty photographer photographing young breast cancer survivors? Why did he embark on this journey and what motivates him to continue?

Fascinated, I reached out to David Jay – who reached back with enthusiasm and warmth. I then met a genuinely kind and caring man, whose world had been turned upside down when confronted by a close friend’s body after a mastectomy. He told me that he dealt with it the only way he knew how, by taking her picture. And the rest is history.

Q: Can you describe the process, and the emotions of filming such painful images? (ones that most breast cancer patients haven’t seen before they have a mastectomy–hopefully The SCAR Project will change that.)

A: We were an all female team during the photo shoot sessions, our goal was to be unobtrusive and document the event, what we experienced was a palpable transformation taking place before us. Women would come to the door broken and nervous and by the time they left, they had a renewed sense of pride, hope and strength. Every single woman exuded beauty that came from her resolve and attitude, which David captured perfectly.

It was a very special experience, albeit a tough one, being able to capture this transformation, to be able to share in the anguish, the pain, the tears and the laughter.

Q: What were some of the hi-los of filming this project? What surprised you most about filming “Baring It All”?

A: Meeting and spending time with these amazing, strong young women has been an incredible high. I have been touched in a profound way by all the women we met, and I’ve learned so much from them – celebrate life and live in the moment. I remind myself of that daily.

The lows have obviously come when confronted with beautiful young girls struggling to beat this horrible disease.

What surprised me most was the enlightened attitude of such young women and their strength in the face of their mortality.

Q: How did you get into filming?

A: I started working in TV & film in Australia after graduating from University. My first job was working at a TV station and it just went from there.

Q: What do you consider your particular calling in the film industry to be?

A: I enjoy producing, finding compelling stories and character, and then finding the right team to execute that story. I really love meeting people and learning about them, and under the pretense of filmmaking I get to ask lots of questions most people are afraid to.

Q: What other film work have you done?

A: I started working in narrative features, but then about 7 years ago I was presented with the opportunity to co-produce a documentary, and from that point on I was hooked. I loved telling real stories by real people. Who needs a script, real life is far more compelling, heart-warming, and heartbreaking.

Q: The doc was originally titled “Don’t look away”? How did it go from there to “Baring It All?”

A: The doc was originally titled “Don’t Look Away”, a title Nicola my co-producer came up with. We decided on that title early on because people’s initial reaction at hearing about the subject and photos was to look away. The entire message and point of the project was to remove the stigma and normalize something that so many women undergo but no one ever sees or talks about. We wanted people to look at the photos, look at the women, at the scars, and at their eyes. The name was changed when the Style Network came on board as they felt that “Don’t Look Away” didn’t adequately describe what the film was about. After much back and forth, we settled on “Baring It All” as the new title.

Q: How did the Style Network come on board to air the documentary?

A: Two great women, Beth and Andrea from Remarkable Content took my trailer to the Style Network about a year before they actually came on board. The VPs at Style thought it was an important story to tell and one that their viewers could connect with, however one-off documentaries were completely out of the realm of their usual programming that it just didn’t work. They came back to me about a year after our initial conversation and the VPs had come up with an over-brand series called Style Exposed, which would include one-off documentaries. “Baring It All” is the first in the Style Exposed series. Hopefully it’s a success for Style and they continue to produce one-off documentaries with heart.

 Q: Who/what/where are you going to watch the premiere?!

A: I will be watching the premiere with David, Joanie, Nicola and my crew at David’s studio on Saturday night.

Q: When/how will the dvds be available?

A: The DVDs will be available on July 25^th through Amazon. The SCAR Project, Volume 1 book is also available on Amazon.

Q: How would you articulate the message you hope people get when they view your doc and the SCAR Project?

A: I want people to see that there is true beauty in strength and hope in the face of despair. There’s power in optimism and it’s ok to have scars and to look at them and let people see them.

In line with the SCAR Project message, the goal is to raise awareness and let people know that young women can and do get breast cancer. Early detection is the best prevention, therefore the more people who see the film or the SCAR Project photos the bigger the impact.

Q: How can people follow you, support the amazing things you are doing like this documentary?

A: People can keep up to date with my work via my website at www.lostinvision.com or via Facebook.

Q: What are you doing next?

A: I’m developing a project that deals with alternatives to incarceration, with a focus on young women who are at risk, and we hope to help transform their lives before it’s too late.

Q: Not really a question, but I’d just like to thank Patricia for a brilliant interview and also say “go break a leg!” in re: the “Baring It All” premiere this Saturday night. And I’ll just go ahead and say BRAVO! because I know it’s going to, as The SCAR Project intends: Raise public consciousness of early-onset breast cancer, raise funds for breast cancer research/outreach programs and help young survivors see their scars, faces, figures and experiences through a new, honest and ultimately empowering lens. So kudos Patricia. Cheers and kudos.

[This article is cross posted at Thescarprojectcincy blog.]

But then again maybe that’s just me. Anyway. I don’t know if Vanessa and her sisters, Jessica and Christina, were channeling Winnie the  Pooh when they began their Blustery Day Design business, after Vanessa was diagnosed with breast cancer, but they definitely weren’t channeling Eeyore.

Vanessa did not sitting around sulking, like Eeyore always did whenever Christopher Robin would put his tail back on, saying “No matter. Most likely lose it again anyway.”

Like she told Fox 19’s Katie Morgan, “I know for a lot of people, their world just empties out. But for me, I was always: Well, what can I do about it?”

Vanessa credits her positive outlook and upbeat perspective to the incredible support she receives from her family.

Not many lifetime marriages are tested on the “in sickness” vows like Billy and Vanessa have been ever since Vanessa was diagnosed with breast cancer nine months after they said “I do.” (Happy anniversary to Billy and Vanessa, btw, who celebrated their 5th anniversary last week! Cheers to you both, and to both of your health, and here’s to MANY more anniversaries!)

And then there are Vanessa’s sisters, Jessica Yeager and Christina Blust.

“My sisters mean the world to me. They are my best friends,” says Vanessa, the sister in the middle.

Like bookends, Vanessa’s sisters were by her side, supporting her.

“Besides the obvious actions that were now immediately needed, to learn about her cancer and treatment plan and how we could best support Vanessa in this new, crappy situation…” Jessica explained in a recent interview. “…we also found we all felt like we needed to act, immediately, in another way, too, to make our dream to start a future business together ‘real’.

“I think we were destined to have a business together. Our different strengths and preferences complement each other, and we are best friends who truly love working together. Despite the obvious desire we had to do this, we felt no rush towards action on it, since we were each still finishing our degrees, getting married, buying houses, and enjoying young adulthood.  Our business plans seemed like something we’d do ‘once we grew up’ still, and we meanwhile relished our casual chats as young twenty-somethings talking about this sister business we’d certainly have, one day, and just how great it will be.

“Until Vanessa was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer at age 25. That just made us rethink our whole timeline.

“Finding out about her cancer was a major wake up call.  We realized that waiting for the ‘perfect’ time to start just resulted in lots of waiting…  and we no longer had the luxury of time in which to wait. The time, perfect or not, was now.

“While Vanessa had her first chemo treatments, we sat next to her in the visitor chairs and talked through our business plan.  We took trips to try on wigs together and then followed that up with visits to paper shops.  We’d google ‘Adriamycin side effects’ and then google ‘small business web hosting’.  It became a joint project, this cancer and this business.  Together they formed a strange partnership of slowing things down and speeding things up, all at once.

“The company name that we settled on for our business was Blustery Day Design.  This is something of a play on our maiden names of ‘Blust’, but we also saw including a ‘blustery day’ in our name as a fitting testimony to both the good and the bad parts of life, the ups and the downs, the happy and the sad.  We believe all parts, all days, and all moments, are worth celebrating, acknowledging and supporting.  Our business is founded in part on a desire to assist people in really being there for each other, in small but meaningful ways, through everything life contains.

“Once we got ‘real’, our cancer greeting cards were an obvious first product line for Blustery Day Design to develop.  Who better than Vanessa, with her insider perspective, to create authentic and heartfelt cards that said exactly what she wanted to have said to her, exactly what she knew would cheer up someone else who was in just her shoes.

“When she got overloaded by the many very supportive but very pink cards and gifts, Vanessa came up with the ‘no pink‘ card.  When she felt her most low from treatments and surgeries that left her bald, boobless, and puffy, she created the ‘still beautiful‘ card.  As she weathered the storm that is chemo and all its side effects, Vanessa made the ‘chemo brain‘ card. When we all joked about how many times we just wished there was an actual ‘cancer card’ you could pull out of your wallet to get special treatment at needed times, our wallet-sized ‘cancer card‘ was born.

“The creation of the different cancer cards is therapeutic for us, but the feedback we hear back from customers who have sent on our cards is truly the most rewarding part.  To hear how Vanessa’s insight and experiences have brightened the day of someone else dealing with cancer, or to know our simple and small card let someone know they were loved and supported, gives us such a sense of making a difference in the lives of others in the world wide community – and this is a key part of what our goals are for our business.

“Currently, when I think of my sisters and our business, I am overwhelmed with a feeling of gratitude and hope.  Seems rather odd to feel or say, seeing as Vanessa is now more recently diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer, which means her cancer has spread throughout her body, will never be gone, and she will never be ‘cured’.  She has cancer as a terminal disease now, and the stats that go along with it are both sobering and horrible.  We have sister cry sessions over the fact that cancer has taken from us what we each imagined our futures containing –  different paths that still end with the three of us, with our own families, old and wrinkly and getting together for ice cream and marathon gab sessions at the ripe age of 96.  Life, it’s clear, is not fair, and the privilege of a limitless future is too often taken for granted.

“I’d rather go back to the boring, normal life where our business dreams were slow moving and Vanessa didn’t have cancer, any day.  But she has cancer, and we had the business in us all along, and now we’re running with them both – and we have resolved to use the business to defy the cancer.

“We have already made a difference in the lives of people around the world, and have so many ideas to do even more.  We are able to make a real contribution towards stopping this awful thing that is cancer, by choosing a promising local cancer research foundation to donate a portion of our cancer cards’ proceeds to.

“We have taken something ugly, and found the beauty there still.  We love, and live, sincerely.  Life is good.”

Not too shabby a mantra.

Vanessa’s younger sister, Christina adds, “I am so grateful, every day, that I get to be part of this with two of my favorite people in the world. Stationery makes sense for us — it’s all about reaching out in a meaningful way to the people in each of our lives, creating true communication and strengthening relationships no matter if the circumstance is a joyous event or a tough bit of news.”

“Being able to reach people with our cards has been amazing,” Vanessa sums up, harmonizing with the gratitude her sisters have so eloquently articulated. “I am grateful to be able to share my talent in a positive way and spread peace. Receiving feedback from our customers who give our cards to a friend is the best part. It reaffirms that what we are doing is really touching others. And isn’t that what our purpose in life is? — To spread hope?

“Although I wasn’t aware of it at the time, I have come to realize that me creating cancer cards for others to share has been my way of dealing with and expressing myself after my diagnosis. Some people write in a journal, or paint a picture, but for me, it was to use my graphic design talent to outwardly express my thoughts and emotions. And for Christina, it was through her music. She coped by writing songs. She is so gifted with words and melodies, and in way, paints pictures with her songs. I’ll never forget the first time I heard ‘Tumor‘ which she wrote after finding out that our Mom had a brain tumor and I had breast cancer all in the same week. She writes eloquently, ‘Tumor, you are mistaken: you are actually a small, frenzied moth. I will watch you from the front door. You will kiss the light on my porch, find in its brilliance fatal joy — you will not spread. You will die for love instead.’

“And in the song ‘Sudden Amaryllis‘ she writes ‘Sudden amaryllis! In dead fields reach lilies to the sky, to the sky. Hope is dancing in the sky. (Hope is staring right at you.)’. Christina was stricken with the fact that these flowers survive and thrive in the most barren places…in a gravel lot with otherwise no signs of life, these amaryllis flowers stand tall. I think this is a great analogy to my life now,” explains Vanessa. “Although there is all this ugliness an misfortune around me, I keep my head up and live sincerely.”

Live Sincerely. Now those are two words that’ll turn “The End” upside down. It’s never too early to start.